Frankenstein #2

I know that's not the whole title but I think Shade as an acronym is silly. Getting that right out of the way.

Spoilers as well.

In my last post I heaped praise on Lemire's Animal Man #2 like potatoes at Thanksgiving dinner. Well, now I'm on a diet. Frankenstein is, um, not good.

Essentially: Frankenstein discovers a bunch of kids and that other kids apparently were used as sacrifices. Frank bitch slaps the priest across the cellar and then mutters a one-liner about his wrath not discriminating by age. Ho-hum.

Then the crew inside the church walks out into the street where they were just moments ago last issue, and suddenly the street is clear of monsters. Well, living monsters. The vampire and werewolf dudes are standing over a massacre of vaguely drawn monsters. Apparently, they cleared out what was a huge effin deal last month in no time. Maybe in the time between issues they were still killing all the monsters that had overrun the town. Whatever.

So Father Time has figured out where the monsters are coming from so they head over. He picks the fish lady as his companion to go see the portal under the lake. In some lackluster storytelling, fish lady jumps into the water and narrates some stock narration intro to the effect of "while I should have been thinking about the mission I could only remember blah blah blah."

She gives us her back story that includes a dead child (sad) and then the resulting work she's done for SHADE. The first monster-making project actually made monsters (whoda thunk) and so they have to ditch them into a different dimension (hm, sounds suspiciously familiar). Later she used actual human adults for the existing team test and so that is the genesis of the team (yay now I know).

Of course we find out more about the monster portal and that the town has been superstitiously sacrificing children to it, and that the monsters they already fought were scouts, and the rest of the planet is set to invade.

Someone then makes the stupidest conclusion ever that they need to take the fight to them as a result. Or, you know, you could figure out a way to close the fucking portal to an evil monster filled planet set on invading your own. But no, they pull some dimensional ship out of someone's ass then they head through.

Science scanners tell them the planet's surface is organic but when they get through it's full of monsters. Oh no! And Frankenstein's "wife" is standing atop a pile of these monsters and she quips "about time". And scene.

Now, I realize I summarized here and summary is not criticism, or so M keeps telling her students, but I wanted to go through the plot to point out how ridiculous this story is. I don't require a serious or lofty story, but I do want one that makes sense, and this story is a disaster.

Worse, it really does seem like those monsters that fish lady made in our shoehorned narrative flashback have a good shot at being the monster planet. Which would be super lame. And super convenient. And, worse, very poorly foreshadowed. I hope I'm wrong.

I also joked before about the vaguely drawn monsters, but the art in this book is a little underwhelming. Where Animal Man has a weird art style that compliments the genre it is working in, Frankenstein's art style just seems lazy and fails to illustrate this convoluted world they are constructing. This is a real campy series, and I dig the premise, but give me some details and consistency in the art. When characters are not in focus they are drawn like after thoughts, and the whole village/planet of monsters loses all impact because they look like a mass of monster masses. Nothing can be too scary or threatening because they just look like body shaped squiggles with some teeth and eyes. Save me.

So then my final complaint is one I wrote about in my impressions of Frankenstein #1, and that is Frankenstein's lack of character. This guy is supposed to be the main character of a series that is inherently campy. The werewolf dude makes a joke with Frankenstein and he's all like, hrrm, I don't have time for humour. Of course, by the end he does make a joke, and he says that he is learning to adapt. He better learn to adapt pretty damn quick and make that a defining characteristic, because a campy comic with a main character without a strong sense of irony is a comic that falls as flat as the last two issues. If you're going to rip off Hell Boy, at least rip off the reason people like Hell Boy.

I still like the mummy. If nothing else, they should make the comic about him. Cuuuurse...

October 5th, 12th, and 19th Pull List: This Shit is Going to Cost Me

I have been irresponsible in purchasing these comics by week. Now I have to go and buy three weeks of comics. I hope not to have much trouble getting all the comics I want since they should be reserved for me, though I can't remember exactly what my reserve list says, but it shouldn't be too far off the below.

Let's do this week by week:

October 5

• Action Comics - I am really excited about this one. I like the reduced powers Superman. And to see him in the hands of government is a promising story.
• Animal Man - From what I've seen, this comic is going to get messed up. Love it.
• Swamp Thing - I'm hoping Swamp thing is actually in this one.

October 12
Oh crap, this month had a stack. Might need to get one of those payday cash loans for tonight.

• Batgirl - I like Batgirl as a character. Looking forward to more self deprecating inner monologue. I have a feeling this comic might be a little more serious though, dealing with the complications of her PTS.
• Batwoman - I can't wait to look at this comic. Might also read it too.
• Frankenstein - This is one of those, I hope this book changes my mind scenarios.
• Green Lantern - Haha. Oh Green Lantern. People like you, I'll see if I can get it.
• Resurrection Man - I'm curious to see where this one goes. I'm wonder how the demon school girls plan to cosplay this month. Maybe french maids?
• Suicide Squad - I'm intrigued by the, kill the entire stadium thing. Please explain #2. Also, let's see some more of that shark guy.

October 19
Good golly. Do you really think this is a good idea? I had plans this weekend.

• Batman - This is the Batman I chose, and I'll give him a chance. Every other comic I've read him, he's a narrative device. I'm hoping Batman might actually be a character here. Might need a DC encyclopedia to understand the history of all his sidekicks though.
• Birds of Prey - I'll give this one another shot. Not a lot of enthusiasm for it though. Might feel better if more of the team is involved.
• Catwoman - Big shit storm of the month award aside, I really dug Catwoman, which I discussed at length. She's funny, in charge, developed, and the comic is obsessed with her body, like almost every other DCnew52 comic was about their female characters. *cough cough Voodoo cough*
• Wonder Woman - I'm hoping there is less equestrian sacrificial transformations this month. Run sheepies, run!

What is 13 times $3?

Fuck it. It's for my art!

DCnew52 Month 1 Roundup, Part 1

Been busy at work and at home, and that stack of comics wasn't going to read itself. So, while I'm two weeks behind, I just want to get all of this ugly #1 business out of the way. With awards. Some spoilers.

Aquaman


What was this character like before this book? Did he have his own book or did he just sort of stand around in the JL? Did people make fun of him back then or is this a new development for Aquaman's world?

However Aquaman used to be written, I gotta say, this is a great way to do him. The comic is really self deprecating and has a lot of fun with the character's ethos. Aquaman himself has a touch of emo to him, but I guess we need somewhere to start with the story. "My daddy boo hoo hoo." Shut up and fight some scary fish men.

Favourite part: when the police officer asks if he wants a glass of water and Aquaman just stares at him for a panel.

Best Sense of Humour about Aquaman Award

Firestorm

I felt good about this comic in the beginning. The fake terrorists were fairly brutal and a nice change from super villains. I didn't even mind the racial conflict established between the comic's two protagonists. The dialogue was okay and the bad guys were plausible and threatening.

Then the super powers came out and the characters erupted into melodramatic monologues before they even knew they were fucking super heroes. The end is a real big let down.

Best Sudden Turn to Shit Award

Wonder Woman

This comic has received a lot of praise. And justifiably. It sets up a pretty odd scenario with the villains/mystery, and it pulls Wonder Woman into the story with what seems to be the stretchiest stretches ever used in narrative. "Hey look, take this thing-a-ma-jim. Yay, now Wonder Woman is here."

The introduction of the centaurs is also one of the most disturbing things I've seen out of the New 52. At first I thought the figure in the feathers was WW, until she sliced off the head of that horse and then a mutherfucking torso started climbing out. Jesus mighty.

Most Intriguing Use of Greek Mythology Award
Poor Horsies Award

Animal Man

I was pretty excited for this comic. Maybe a little too excited. In my excitement I actually read a great deal of material that was released promoting this book and the new 52. Unfortunately this left me with not much new material to read when I sat down with the book. I had seen a lot of the pages before, so I really just read how they connected together.

That said, I enjoyed the family dynamic that Lamire sets up, especially with the daughter. Then when the dream sequence came, it really amped up the story. The last panel in particular shocked the socks off me. It's a fantastic reveal, grounded in a relatively conspicuous element from before. M said it would give her nightmares. Rightly so.

Hands Down Most Amazing and Disturbing Last Panel, like Ever, Award

Frankenstein

Not much to say about this one. The universe seems fine enough, but there isn't much immediately that pops out as all that fun. Frankenstein and team seem like DC's attempt at Hellboy. Problem is Frankie and the rest of the cast just don't seem as engaging as Hellboy and crew. Better shape up!

Biggest Dissapointment Award
Most Blatant Hellboy Ripoff Award

Batwoman

This book just looks incredible. It is worth a read if only to look at the page layouts. I'm pretty happy to see a lesbian as a main Bat-character as well.

Can't say I am immediately won over by the supernatural stuff that Batwoman seems to be up against. Fighting ghosts and skeleton-headed secret government agency middle management are not typically what I expect of a Batman comic, but I am willing to give it a chance.

My worries are a) that it might actually be ghosts or some shit which doesn't fit in with the Batman universe as I've come to know it. Batman and friends have enough trouble fighting the villains in Gotham, they don't need to fight ghosts on top of that. That's what Ghostbusters are for.

Or b) that it isn't a ghost and we're going to get pulled into an inappropriately adult shifted Scooby Doo caper. "I would have done it too, murdered all those people, if it weren't fer that pesky Batwoman."

Best Page Layouts Award
Holy Shit Batwoman is Fighting a Fucking Ghost Award

Batgirl

This is another comic that is just really charming. Batgirl is a lot of fun to read as a character. Her inner monologue as she handles the perps is quite funny and endearing.

Of course, there is an elephant in the room, a big elephant that got out of it's even bigger wheelchair. I understand why people are upset that Barbra Gordon has been undone as an example of a strong disabled female character. I don't have a but there, it's a real shame.

Barbara is dealing with posttraumatic stress though, so there is that. One disability was switched for another. This might not seem like a fair trade for those people that used to look to her as an strong example of a character with a disability, but maybe people with anxiety disorders feel differently.

Most Unfortunate Controversy

Batman

Batman is a fairly unremarkable comic. I mean I like Batman, and the beginning where he's fighting all the famous villains is pretty enjoyable, and their designs are pretty decent.

But the whole mystery that we are introduced to isn't all that intriguing. I have to say it should seem obvious to everyone that the revealed suspect obviously isn't the killer. Maybe in some weird comic-booky way, but not in any honest character driven way. Maybe I'm wrong, but it is most likely that I'm not. So the mystery seems a little hollow.


Highest Robins per Panel Ratio Award

Red Hood

Since I'm doing the run down on Batman titles, why not discuss Red Hood now and get this all done with.

So yes, Starfire is horribly objectified and portrayed as a body that desires casual sex with whomever. This is likely not the way that DC should responsibly portray their characters. If that's what her character is like, than there is nothing wrong with her choosing to have casual sex with every man in the DC universe. The sticking point is whether this is pandering to the base male audience that comic readers are often thought of as. So there. Starfire's depiction pretty much ruins what starts out as a pretty decent comic.

Yeah! I really liked the first few pages of Red Hood. The art is crisp, and the first few pages frame the setting and action really well. When Red Hood bursts from the fat priest suit I was conflicted. While this was pretty damn cool, I knew Starfire was about to show up.

And she does show up, and then I started feeling uncomfortable with the writing. While the shots of Starfire Baywatching are pretty reprehensible, one of the things that offends me the most is when Roy asks Red Hood about his relationship with Starfire he makes a comment about how he has had her. I didn't realize escaping in a jeep from a military group was also the time for locker room talk about penis conquests. Silly me.

To be fair, I've never been in a jeep fleeing a military force or a locker room. What would I know.

Biggest Boob Award
Best Opening Award

Tomorrow's Shopping List: Sept. 14, 2011

There is some sort of shark man on this team. Um, can he swim through concrete, because I remember those guys.

Looking over what's set to release this week, my eyes go a little fuzzy. Who is Deathstroke, or Legion? Could Mister Terrific really be that terrific if he can't come up with a better moniker than Mister Terrific. I don't know what his powers are, but I bet they are more specific than simply being terrific.

I recognize the Green Lantern and Batbrand books, but they don't garner much interest for me. I read about the Blackest Night on Wikipedia and it put me off Lanterns pretty good, and while I do like Batman, reading the description of Batman and Robin, I get lost after Damien Wayne. And Batwoman? Is she different than Batgirl?

I thought the point of the reboot was to help people that are put off by the backlog of continuity. Maybe I'm just too lazy too look this stuff up. But whose fault is that DC? Hmm?

I do recognize Frankenstein Agent of Shade though, but only because a) Frankenstein, drr, and b) Jeff Lemire is writing this one too.

But on to what I'm planning on picking up tomorrow:

• Frankenstein Agent of Shade (I'm sure this will be sold out by the time I get there but I can always try)
• Batwoman (put my confusion where my eyes are)
• Suicide Squad (I'm hoping a the villain ops team proves to be worth reading, but really hoping Harley Quinn keeps her clothes on)
• Resurrection Man (mainly because his powers sound weird)
• maybe Legion Lost if it looks good in a flip through

There we go. God knows what I'll be coming home with.

I think I'm going to start calling myself Mister Better-than-Average. Better-than-Average Boy?